God's intention for marriage is: marriage should reflect god's redeeming love, which is his redeeming love for us in Christ.
Marriage is about character; To have children and create a stable community of human society; It is to be done through a strong and lasting connection between the sexes that complements each other.
If you do not believe in the holy spirit, if you believe in what Christ has done for you, then giving up your rights and desires means "gnashing your teeth" and "putting a knife in your heart".
But if a man have the spirit in Christ with him, and keep him, he that giveth himself is set free.
We must learn to repent for all our SINS and SINS under righteousness -- the sin that we want to be our savior and master.
We must also acknowledge that we place our ultimate hope and trust in things other than god, and that in our SINS and righteousness we all want to escape or manipulate god in order to hold on to those things.
Only when we set our eyes on god can we be truly satisfied and happy.
Otherwise, just as Jacob saw leah in the morning, but not Rachel, his heart was filled with disappointment.
Repentance is not lowering your head... It is the sorrow that arises within us that sin itself becomes worse to us than punishment.
You may know a lot about god, but you don't really know him.
Unless what he did for you in Jesus Christ changed the fundamental structure of your heart.